Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
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