Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
PANTIES FOUND
Randomize
