i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
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