What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
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