I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
