he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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