we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
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Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
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Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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