Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
