Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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