I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
if only i could text you this smell
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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