I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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