remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
