I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Randomize