u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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