Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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