I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
