i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
