dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
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