My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
