Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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