Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
