he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
