Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
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