Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
