porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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