True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
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