So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Do you have feelings for this penis?
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
