you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
