my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
