i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
