8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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