WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
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