I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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