Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
