Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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