im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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