Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize