What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Randomize
