Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize