You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Randomize
