oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
