Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
