im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
