he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
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