We're like a lot better than the average bears
420 ftw
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
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