We're like a lot better than the average bears
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
