i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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