ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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