drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Randomize