respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
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