just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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